Running

Bismillah

Ah~ Everytime this happens I feel like crap.
Today... and yesterday... I'm running. Running from everything around me. I know it's foolish to dwell on this matter. So I must keep quiet and think this through properly.

You get the feeling that sometimes you are not who you think you are. Or moments when you think people see you differently (in a negative way). I have these moments once in awhile and during these times I feel very lonely. I remember that one time I cried so hard because of this and looked up at the sky which was painted orange by the falling sun and somehow my problems got carried away little by little.
Today I didn't have the sky to look at or a friend to ask me if I was ok. Today I read a sunnah from my beloved prophet. Today I tried harder to focus on my solat. I read the mathurat with gusto. I read some comics to cheer me up. I practiced the only Kata I remembered from my beloved karate. I did some laundry and some cleaning. I did part of my assignment. I listened to some songs. I watched the few last episodes of Code Blue.
I think that when life gets you down, you just got to keep yourself busy and do the things you love doing. The feeling is not completely gone but it did not break my heart and it did not consume me. That alone is enough for me to continue the day.
I guess I'm okay. It really doesn't matter what people think of me as long as I self-contemplate and fix myself to be better everyday for You.

Maybe tomorrow I'll go for a long trip to the park and do some running.
Alhamdulillah