Bismillah,
It's been SOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO long. Last post was in April?! I still can't fathom why I did not post anything in this blog. I must've been busy.... (or lazy)...
Just some brief recaps of what happened along the way. So I went to Korea, flunked my ACCA (results not out yet but I don't have to be pyschic to know I failed), almost created WW1 between me and my colleagues AND got slightly praised by my Group Manager.
Korea was awesome. I felt like I'd love to go there again someday but maybe just to travel the countrysides. The hiking areas seem amazing there. So clean and the routes are very safe. I got called pretty by a sweet ajushi. Then a haraboji and halmoni took photos of me. I think I kinda let the praise get to my head. I returned to the hotel and started calling myself ugly to bring me back down from cloud nine. Korean food is delish! I love their side dishes the most although I think they tend to use too much salt. Mostly we travelled a lot in Seoul. I was very excited to take my picture with General Lee Su Shin. I'm an avid fan of Generals. We even went to Nami Island. More popular for the drama Winter Sonata but I love that it actually has a history based on General Nami. He was framed and only after death was his name cleared. He was a young general and died early as well. I'm already romanticizing all of this in my head.
ACCA was DAMN tough. I should NEVER go on a holiday one week before exams. Just NEVER! I remember looking at the first question and all I can think of was "Yep. I'm doomed."
I'm the kind that gets pissed of very quickly when it involves something that goes against my principle. For example. My colleagues close account early without completing the recon work. They wait for ME to do it and then just copy mine. On top of that, all the difference in the recon were mostly from their side. Not only they copy my work but they also make me find their mistakes. Not being one to tolerate things for so long (trust me... I waited almost a year to bring this up), I brought this issue to my manager and finally brought it into meeting. During the meeting, a friend said that it just happened to be like that because they are 'too busy' and that our 'closing time is different'. Heck. Don't mind me... I'm not busy at all. Free as a fluffy bluebird in the skies. (enough of the sarcasm). I don't mind her because I know her position. It's my other so called seniors who are suppose to close their accounts earlier than me that bug me. What was more annoying was they had to be asked to comment or they'd just sit there and it's like you are talking to the wall.... or chair. Thankfully this little issue has not spoiled my relations with them although they might view me as a stuck up rigid individual in the office.
I'm alright with it as long as I've gotten my point accross to them. I'm often viewed as stuck up and rigid. Not my fault I'm trying to do my job while some people act like children. No wonder my manager gets annoyed when I say "I'm too busy". Annoying excuse ever. Remind me not to use it.
So Ramadhan is here. I had holiday for 6 long days. I've been reacquainted with my deadly nafs and it was not a pretty encounted. Dark days indeed. I have declared war against them so many times and always just when victory seems close they creep up again. I sometimes hate myself for being so weak.
My Group Manager said I was one of the best staff in our dept. It pleased me to hear this but I was kind of disappointed that my direct superior did not echo the same statement. Perhaps she does not think my work is all that great. There are some times when I think she just hates to deal with me but I can't expect everyone to like me. I know I'm not that likeable. My COO ever commented that I 'like to cari gaduh'. Well... maybe.
Also my GM commented that I put heart in my work and that I'm very sensitive person. All true. I cannot give less than 90% when doing something and I hate to see that others do. Also I get very emotional sometimes and get butthurt easily. Maybe I need to work with my professionalism and act stoic.
Someone asked me what happened to Sir Rapier... Well that story is for another day cause I'm.... 'too busy'. (don't shoot me).
Alhamdulillah.
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